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FENCING IN YOUR GARDEN “ Jesus told them another parable: "The kingdom of heaven is like a man who sowed good seed in his field. But while everyone was sleeping, his enemy came and sowed weeds among the wheat, and went away. When the wheat sprouted and formed heads, then the weeds also appeared.” -Matthew 13:24-26 Even after we have turned over and de-rooted the soil, sowed seed and sufficiently watered it, we must protect the garden against the enemy who would sow weeds in our garden, and destroy the harvest. That’s what fences are for. In the same way we fence in our gardens if we plan on seeing a harvest, we must also fence in our marriages to protect our marriage from outside threats. What are some of the threats our fence should guard us against? First of all, there may be a potentially dangerous relationship. If either spouse is having a relationship with anyone else we must assess the propriety of that relationship by asking the question, “Would I be willing to let my spouse look into my mind to see what my thoughts are concerning this person?” If the answer is no, then that relationship is potentially dangerous, and we must build a fence between that person and us. It may mean severing the relationship totally. It could also be a matter of in-laws or other extended family members getting involved in our garden. This is a sensitive area, because we still want to be loving, tenderhearted and kind, but we may have to build fences to protect the garden of our marriage from well-meaning family members who want to tend our garden. We may have to build fences against bad habits or addictions that interfere with our intimacy. We must say “no” to alcohol, drugs, pornography and other “idols” that destroy marriages and families. These fences must be tall and impregnable. A more subtle threat may be the cares of this world. We get so caught up in working, taking care of the kids, etc., that we let the cares of this world tramp all over our garden. How do we decide where to build fences? By mutual agreement. Yes, you’ll have to sit down face-to-face and communicate about where to build your fences. The garden called marriage must be secured and defended. Boundaries must be well defined. Then it will produce a harvest of righteousness peace and love. What a garden! Question For the Both of Us: Where do you feel we need fences to protect our marriage from outside forces that would intentionally or unintentionally destroy our garden? What would those fences look like? Prayer for The Both of Us: Lord, give us wisdom to see where we must build fences, and grant us the grace to be open and honest with one another so that our garden of marriage will be beautiful in your sight, and a source of pleasure and encouragement to all who see it. |
© 2007 Marriage & Family Savers Ministries